Anything Goes King
by shadowgirlVG
Summary: Yami feels his title as King of Games is being threatened, by a little pigtailed boy named Ranma
1. Yami Yugi Chat

Yugi blinked, it was happening again. There were blank spots in his memory. Last thing he remembered was leaving school and now it was eight at night. He had no idea what he had done in-between. Or rather what Yami had done. The last time this had started happening it was when Yugi was not yet aware of Yami. When they had become one fully that had stopped happening, until now.  
  
Yugi knew he had to confront the millennium puzzle's spirit. The two of them had been good friends for so long, why was he hiding something from him now?  
  
Taking a deep breath h reached inside himself and brought out the other spirit within him. Before Yugi could say anything Yami said, "I know what want to talk about Yugi, I knew I shouldn't have been hiding anything from you but this I just felt was so personal."  
  
"What is it?" asked the intrigued boy.  
  
"Lately there has been a boy who has been challenging my title as King of Games. Not on purpose but he's been challenged and won enough different competitions that it has me worried."  
  
Yugi nodded, not many people knew it but Yami loved his title and was very protective of it. "Who is it?"  
  
"It's a sixteen-year-old martial artist named Ranma Saotome. Your memory's been blacking out when I've been trying to find out more about him. I don't know much more than that though, strange things kept happening. Once I was almost to his house when I got knocked down by a girl running from a cat who was being chased by a duck. I was lucky I made it that far though since I got horrible directions from a boy wearing a bandanna, had me going in the exact opposite direction."  
  
"So what are you going to do?" asked Yugi.  
  
"I'm going to challenge him."  
  
A/N: Okay you guys I'm going to need your help to come up with some weird competitions for this. Ranma's defiantly not going to be able to sit down and duel. We need something a bit more random and with martial arts.... 


	2. The Challenge

The Challenge  
  
"Say what?" said Joey the next day at school. "He thinks his title's being threatened? By some boob with a pigtail?"  
  
"I was surprised too," said Yugi. "But that's what he told me. He even went to challenge him." He paused, taking a second to remember the day before.  
  
************************************  
  
"I'm going to challenge him," said Yami.  
  
Without further ado they were off to the mysterious boy's house. Apparently all the weirdness had cleared out because nothing slowed them down on the way.  
  
Yugi knocked on the door cautiously. It was opened by a nice- looking girl with long hair who must have been about 19.  
  
"Hello," she said with a smile. "How can I help you?"  
  
"I'm looking for a boy named Ranma Saotome. Does he live here?"  
  
"Why yes he does, I'm not sure if he's home now though..." Suddenly there was a crash and a girl's voice screamed "RANMA YOU JERK!". "Never mind," said the nice girl. "Come on in, I'll see if I can get him away from Akane. Oh, by the way my name is Kasumi."  
  
"I'm Yugi."  
  
"So nice to meet you Yugi." There was another crash. "Oh dear," said Kasumi and she hurried off.  
  
Yugi waited patently for a few minutes trying to ignore more crashes, yelling, and screams of terror. 'What are we getting ourselves into?' thought Yugi to Yami.  
  
Suddenly a pigtailed boy appeared before them. "Are you the boy Kasumi said was looking for me?" For some reason there was steam coming off of him and he was dripping wet.  
  
"Yes I am," said Yugi. "My name is Yugi Moto, you must be Ranma Saotome."  
  
"Yeah that's me. So what do you want?"  
  
"Well a while ago I won the title King of Games and I ..." suddenly Yami took over, "and I would like to challenge you so that I can still be worthy of that title."  
  
Ranma scratched his head. "But why me? Games aren't exactly my kind of thing."  
  
"You've entered and won enough strange and diverse contests that I believe you threaten me. So what do you say?" Yami held out his hand.  
  
Ranma thought for a minute then took it. "All right Yugi I accept your challenge, you just name the place."  
  
*******************************  
  
"So when are you two going to compete?" asked Joey.  
  
Yugi blushed, "Well Yami couldn't think of anything to compete in so he had to just get Ranma's number and say he'd let him know if he could think of anything."  
  
The others did an anime fall. (Those things are so funny!)  
  
Meanwhile Kaiba who had been listening in the background spoke up, "I might just have the answer to your problem Yugi. Next weekend KaibaLand is opening a new section and if you and this Saotome boy were to compete in it, it would basically be free advertising for me. A competition between the King of Games and someone who he feels threatened by is not something that'll be easily overlooked."  
  
"That sounds great Kaiba!" said an ecstatic Yugi, "I'll tell Ranma right away!"  
  
Kaiba smiled. The real reason he was doing this had nothing to do with free advertising, he had plenty of money and could afford as many ads as he wanted. His real reason was so he could see this Saotome boy in action. If Yami felt his title was threatened by him it was something to look into. Maybe he could show him something to help him defeat Yugi. This Ranma Saotome had to be quite a man.  
  
**Meanwhile**  
  
At the Tendo house a very busty red-headed girl was beating up a punching bag with a series of rapid movements. She had just received the details of her challenge and was already training for it.  
  
Akane watched holding her pet piggy close. "Why are you so worried Ranma? He doesn't seem to be the type you'd worry about martial arts wise. At least not enough to be training this hard this early."  
  
"I might have agreed with you Akane. But when he was challenging me he changed. Suddenly he had a whole different aura. That's the side I'm worried about." She picked up a kettle and poured its contents onto herself. "Besides," said the now male Ranma, "I don't know how we're going to be competing so I want to be ready for anything the guy organizing it might throw at me."  
  
"Who was that again?"  
  
"I think his name was Seto Kaiba. Some filthy rich kid in Yugi's class whose got his own theme park."  
  
Unnoticed by either of the fiancées a person in the shadows moved slowly away.  
  
An hour later the same person was outside Kaiba's office. When he came out it said, "You may know a lot about Yugi but I can help you with Ranma. I'll tell you all his weaknesses and a few interesting facts guaranteed to make this a very interesting competition."  
  
"And who are you?" asked the C.E.O suspiciously.  
  
"Lets just say I have the inside scoop when it comes to Ranma. My first tip'll be free. Make sure whatever you do there's a lot of water involved..." 


	3. The Teams

Chap. 3 Teams  
  
On the Thursday before the Saturday two boys in two different  
towns awoke, visions of duels dancing in they're heads. They both  
had a very different definition of the word but were each looking  
forward to it greatly. Both boys heard the sound of the mailman  
dropping off the day's letters and both went to get them. They saw  
one marked for them and both boys read the same letter,  
  
Dear (Yugi/ Ranma),  
You have chosen to be the first to participate in the special  
challenge arena of Mr. Seto Kaiba. The time and date of your  
competition has been set at 5:30 this Saturday. It is requested  
that by this time you assemble a team of five more members. If you  
cannot Mr. Kaiba shall provide you with them. Thank you for your  
time and we look forward to having you join us at KaibaLand.  
  
Ranma put down his letter. Where would he get five people to be his  
teammates? He knew plenty who could be of great help to him but  
most wouldn't bother since it was just a minor challenge that had  
nothing to do with them.  
  
He was still contemplating this when his face went head-on with a  
bike tire.  
  
"Nihao Ranma!" cried Shampoo who had, as usual, appeared out of no  
where. As Ranma moaned in pain he dropped his letter which she  
picked up curiously. "So Ranma need five teammates for challenge?  
No worry Shampoo help."  
  
And with that she was gone leaving nothing behind her but a path of  
rubble from the dojo's walls. As Ranma pushed himself up he  
thought, Well that's one down.  
  
Within the hour the strange six sense that seemed to connect all of  
Ranma's brides-to-be with him had earned him two new members out of  
Ukyo and Akane (who was in no way jealous of the other girls or  
hopelessly in love with Ranma). He had to draw the line however  
when Kodachi came insisting to aid him as well while trying to  
disable Akane at the same time.  
  
Strangely Akane's pet piggy seemed a bit edgy after hearing Akane  
would be helping Ranma and soon Ryouga appeared insisting to be on  
the team. All in all by dinner Ranma was quite pleased. Now he only  
needed one more member. He was eating his Ramen peacefully when a  
foot from behind forced him to meet it head on.  
  
"Curse you Saotome!" said a familiar voice. "How dare you force  
Shampoo to fight your battles for you! I challenge you!"  
  
"Mousse," said Ranma with a sigh, "it's a team duel and Shampoo  
volunteered to do it."  
  
"Hmmmm. I don't trust you Saotome but alright. I'll join your  
little 'team' to make sure nothing happens to her."  
  
"Fine," said Ranma. "Just don't forget your glasses."  
  
Well that takes care of that, thought Ranma.  
  
*************************************  
  
That Saturday it was pouring rain but there was still quite a crowd  
in front of KaibaLand eager to hear about the big match between the  
King of Games and the boy he had challenged. They hadn't been  
discouraged by the announcement that they wouldn't be able to  
watch. They were determined to stay until the results could be  
announced.  
  
Surprisingly no one seemed to recognize Yugi as he pressed through  
the crowd. He was finally able to reach the stage and join his  
teammates. Unlike Ranma's team they had been easy to come by. He  
had just asked some of his closest friends. Standing beside him was  
Joey, Tristan, Tea, Mai, and Bakura. He looked across the stage and  
was surprised at Ranma's team. He had the girl he had seen beating  
him up the other day but other than that there was a cat, a duck, a  
boy (or was it a girl?) with a giant spatula, and a boy with a  
bandanna crouching fearfully under an umbrella. Ranma himself was  
no where in sight.  
  
Suddenly a voice called over the loud speaker, "Welcome  
participants to the new challenge arena of KaibaLand. Please come  
in at this time. The games are about to begin.  
  
Yugi took a deep but excited breath and stepped across the  
threshold. 


	4. The Games Begin

Chapter 4 The Games Begin  
  
Looking around Yugi saw they were in a very plain-looking room. Not Kaiba's style at all. It was a puke yellow that you usually only saw at school. What was Kaiba up to?  
  
As if in answer to his thoughts the C.E.O entered. He scanned the room looking at the two teams. He wasn't surprised by either of them. It had been obvious that Yugi would invite those fools he called friends. The cat and duck on Team Saotome would have been curious but he had been told about this by his source. The only thing that puzzled him was the absence of the team's leader. Ranma was no where in sight.  
  
Suddenly the doors opened again and in walked a giant panda dragging a red- headed girl in its wake.  
  
"Leggo Pop," yelled the girl, "I can't go in there yet. I'm still a girl. I need to get some hot wat...." She stopped realizing where she was. "Oh well," she sighed. "They probably would have found out anyway."  
  
Kaiba made a strange hand signal and suddenly a hose full of hot water was being blasted at the teams.  
  
"Hey what's the big idea?" asked Joey shaking out his soaked clothes. He heard Tea gasp and looked at the other team. He was shocked to see that the girl had become Ranma and that the cat and duck had been replaced by a naked boy and girl. An extremely attractive naked girl. Joey drooled as clothes were rushed to them and he was soon whacked by an angry (though not jealous) Mai.  
  
Seto Kaiba stared. So it was true. He had had his doubts but this proved it.  
  
"Hey you, with the pointy coat. How did you know to pour hot water on us?"  
  
"It's simple, I had someone with inside information on you tell me all about you. I must say I'm impressed by your track record, despite being an idiot you manage to win quite a bit."  
  
Ranma clenched his teeth but didn't say anything. Akane spoke up, "Who was it? Wait a minute, if there was money involved it had to be..." A figure stepped out of the shadows. "Nabiki!"  
  
"Shame on you sister. I didn't just do it for money. With me helping this game has turned into something a lot more fun. For me anyway."  
  
Kaiba interrupted, "This is all very amusing but we're wasting time..."  
  
"Hold it!" said Tristan (whom I will now be calling Honda) "Why was he a girl? ... and why were the other ones....?"  
  
Blah blah blah explain blah blah blah China blah blah curse.  
  
Ranma finished up. "...and so ever since I've been trying to get back so I can try and find the 'Spring of the Drowned Man'."  
  
Everyone on the Yugi team blinked. "Why didn't you just ask the guide where it was when you first got cursed?" asked Tea (whom I shall now call Anzu, what can I say? I like the manga names. Except Joey's. Way to long.)  
  
"Yeah that seems kinda obvious," said Mai. (a/n this is just something that's been bothering me. I just had to get it out. No one seems to have ever thought of this even in their fics. Ex. Yami/Kurama turns into girl.)  
  
All cursed folk on the Saotome team blinked and thought 'Why didn't I think of that?'  
  
The C.E.O cleared his throat and everyone looked back at him. "As I was saying, the event you will be competing in is designed like a typical day at school." Big question marks all around. "The object of it is to have as many people on your team pass in it as possible as fast as possible. You will have to attend six classes each, four of which you must pass in order to get a total passing grade. There are an equal amount of physical and mental challenges so neither team is at a disadvantage. If any members fail they are out of the game. There is a rule saying that all 'students' must always travel in at least groups of two so if one person fails whoever is with them fails as well to keep the numbers even. Class starts now, you're already late."  
  
A wall opened up to their right to reveal a long hallway. "I'd get moving if I were you." Yami and Ranma looked at each other and started running down the hall, completely forgetting their teammates.  
  
"Hey, wait up!" said Ukyo and everyone began to follow. As soon as they were all in the hall a robotic voice sounded over the loud-speaker, "You are all late. Tardiness is unacceptable."  
  
Suddenly lasers started shooting out of the walls. They had very poor aim so no one was hurt but they managed to singe Joey's hair making him run down the hall screaming ahead of everyone. They soon came to a fork in the hall, Team Yugi took a left and Ranma signaled for his group to take the other way.  
  
Still dodging lasers the Ranma group ducked into the first classroom they could find. Catching their breath they didn't even notice the room around them. Just then a sinister voice called out behind them.  
  
"Welcome to your first class, Home EC!" Ranma turned around and saw an extremely baggy old woman in an apron. She took out a strange remote and pressed a button on it. Six glass tubes came down encasing the team. Lights started flashing on top of them.  
  
"When the lights stop flashing only one will be left on deciding who on your team will compete. Since you are all together if your representative fails you all fail and this game ends before it begins."  
  
Ranma tried to psych himself up. It wasn't that bad, he and Ryouga were okay cooks, Mousse had to be too since he worked at the Cat Café, and Ukyo and Shampoo had their own restaurants. Just as long as it wasn't....  
  
The lights stopped blinking and now there was only one yellow bulb shining above Akane. "So it has been decided," said the baggy lady, "come and meet your opponent."  
  
Akane pressed open her case and stepped out trying to ignore Ranma's sobs. "Okay, what do I have to do?"  
  
"You must defeat her," the old woman pointed to a very familiar face.  
  
"Kodachi!"  
  
Ranma sobbed harder.  
  
*********** Meanwhile ***********  
  
Yugi's group had gone into the gym and was now dodging exploding dodgeballs  
  
******** Also meanwhile **********  
  
Kaiba and Nabiki were still in the main room watching the groups over a bowl of popcorn laughing at the monitors. Okay it was more Nabiki was eating popcorn and laughing. Kaiba was more sitting there looking cool but you can bet he had on hell of a smirk going.  
  
Suddenly someone came up behind them. His name was Joe. He was one of Kaiba's stupider lackeys. He had been working at KabiaCorp for four years now but still didn't know what his employer looked like.  
  
"Hey what are you kids doing here? You're supposed to be in the... the... game thingie." Now Joe in addition to being stupid was also a very big person, which was the entire reason he was hired so he could scare people away. When he expressed a need for them to be in the 'game thingie' he was able to immediately pick them up, drop them in, and lock the door behind them.  
  
They just sat there for a moment before they had to start running from the lasers screaming "That idiot!" 


	5. Just a General AAAAAAAAAAAH!

Chapter 5 Just a General AAAAAAAH!  
  
A/N Sorry for the delay folks but I finally got my muse back.  
  
The old lady turned to Akane again. "This is a competition cook-off. The rules are simple, you must out-cook your opponent, every time you fail to a member of your team will be sent packing and it will be that much harder to win. Your first task is to make me a bowl of ramen noodles. Go!"  
  
"That's not so bad," said Ukyo. "How can she fail to put noodles in a pot of boiling water?"  
  
"You must not know Akane's cooking that well," said Ranma. "She'll find a way."  
  
Sure enough soon the room was full of black smoke and a foul smell, for some reason Akane had decided to cook her noodles in an oven while covered in octopus pieces and vinegar. Needless to say she lost the first round and Ukyo was sucked into a hole in the floor. After several similar rounds Shampoo and Moose were also gone.  
  
As the next round began Akane started thinking fast. At this rate there was no way she would win. She had only one chance. She would have to try and make a food so horrible it would make the teacher faint and then they could escape.  
  
"For your next assignment you must bake me a vanilla cake!" cried the instructor. She shuddered at the thought of what Akane would produce having already tasted three samples of her cooking. Kaiba wasn't paying her enough for this.  
  
Ranma pressed his face against the glass tubing anxiously, at this rate they were going to lose before they had even started. But he couldn't lose yet! There was something important he had to ask that Yugi kid. Something he had to know.  
  
All his hope seemed lost however as he saw the cloud of Akane's furious cooking fury take shape again. He couldn't see anything really but it seemed like she was passing in her cake.  
  
Akane held her breath, she had worked hard to make this cake as awful as possible, she could only hope it would be enough.  
  
The instructor looked nervously at Akane's cake. It looked pretty good, and it smelled wonderful, but then so had the chili she had tried to make and that had resulted in a whole package of Tums in her stomach. She shakily took a fork and inserted the smallest piece possible into her mouth.  
  
Akane felt her shoulders being gripped suddenly. Thinking she was about to be thrown up on she tried to pull away but the teacher held fast. With tears in her eyes she smiled and said, "Akane my dear, you pass! This is the most beautiful cake I have ever tasted!"  
  
In a daze what was left of team Saotome left the room and went wandering down the hall.  
  
** Meanwhile **  
  
Team Yugi wasn't doing very well. They had finally beaten the Evil Dodgeball Machine From Hell that they been facing but in the process they had lost Bakura and Mai (who had gotten knocked out) and Honda (who had broken the machine by throwing one of its balls back at it with the force of a rocket). The result was now only Yugi, Anzu, and Joey were left (and the author was left with much less characters to juggle Yay!) They had been wearily trudging down the hall when they saw Ranma's group up ahead of them.  
  
"Hey Ranma! Wait up!" cried Yugi.  
  
When they had all caught up Yugi spoke again. "This is ridiculous, we'll never get out of here alive if we don't work together. Why don't we just put this challenge aside until we escape and then work something out. Competing like this is just silly." Team Saotome just stared at him dully. "What?"  
  
"You idiot," said Ryouga. " You're the one who arranged this in the first place!" Yugi blushed and Ryouga proceeded to strangle him.  
  
** Meanwhile **  
  
Kaiba and Nabiki had slipped into the first room they could find seeking shelter from the lasers. It had turned out to be a janitor's closet. They sat there for half an hour fuming about being caught in their own trap. Kaiba filled the silence by muttering about all the things he would do to Joe and his entire extended family.  
  
Finally Nabiki said, "Okay that's enough. You designed this place right? You should know an easy way out."  
  
Kaiba shook his head, "I designed it so there was no easy way out. There's no way around it. If we want to get out we'll have to play the game."  
  
Nabiki groaned but stood up and they left the room running down the halls as fast as possible hoping neither team would see them. They finally stopped at a classroom and went inside. They were in the room for that class where you have to pretend you're married and run a little fake household (I don't know what it's called.)  
  
Kaiba was hoping to just demand a passing grade and move on but he didn't seem to understand how the gods of irony worked. Unbeknownst to him the 'teacher' for this subject was actually Joe's uncle and let's just say some things run in the family.  
  
"Hey Old Man!" Kaiba yelled at the shriveled guy in the corner. "Give us a pass so we can get out of here!"  
  
"Oh no no no no noooooo," said Uncle Joe, "not until you earn it! And to earn it you must first prove to me you can manage a family."  
  
"I've been managing a company for years!"  
  
"And yet you can't manage a family?"  
  
"Don't bother Seto," said Nabiki. "He's got the look of an idiot in him."  
  
Kaiba sighed exasperated, "Fine Old Man, what do we have to do?" 'Since when does she call me Seto?'  
  
"Well come on over and we'll get you two 'hitched.'" (a/n whenever Uncle Joe says something with ' ' around it that means he's put little quotation fingers around it.)  
  
They had soon exchanged little plastic rings and had signed a piece of paper.  
  
"Oh, I just love newlyweds! Now you two go off and make a family, come back in a few years so I can give you your grade. Take your time though I think you're a little young right now..."  
  
"Oh knock it off," said Nabiki. "It's not for real."  
  
The old man looked surprised, "Of course it is, I'm a real 'minister' and you two have just signed a legal 'marriage' certificate. You're now legally married by the law of the commonwealth of 'Domino' and you're going to stay that way! I won't allow anyone I marry to get a divorce!" He then slapped a pair of hand-cuffs on them and went scurrying out the door.  
  
Nabiki stared wide-eyed after him. "You don't think he was serious do you?"  
  
Kaiba was already frantically scanning the paper they had signed. He put it down shaking and said, "No, it's real, and it says right here that no one who signs this can divorce without the signature of the person who brought them together!"  
  
They both starred at each other for a long moment before screaming "He's getting away!" and running out the door.  
  
Bwahahahahahahaha! Yes I'm evil I know. I just couldn't resist. Anyway if one of your favorite characters got kicked out in this chapter I'm very sorry but I may bring them back depending on reader demand. I'm also sorry I haven't been saying much about the Yu-Gi-Oh cast but there will be more of them next time I promise. Until then I'm open to any ideas or suggestion that you might have and I promise to update sooner this time. 


End file.
